“Wisdom is the principal thing. Therefore, get wisdom. In all thy getting, get understanding” (Proverbs 4:7).
Wisdom is required to succeed in every sphere of life. Moreso, adequate wisdom is required for marital and premarital relationship, considering the impact of such union on the destinies of such individuals involved. Marriage is a lifetime journey to be made “for better or for worse.” So, going into the marital institution without seeking divine wisdom is a display of self hatred.
However, there is a challenge with definition. God’s definition and perception of wisdom is totally contrary to human definition. “The wisdom of this world is foolishness unto God” (1st Corinthians 3:19)
“but to those who are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God (1st Corinthians 1:24).
“But of him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God, and righteousness and sanctification and redemption” (1st Corinthians 1:30).
From the above scriptures, we see that Jesus Christ himself is the wisdom of God. In other words, if you desire wisdom for marital or premarital relationship, seek the nature of Jesus Christ, the perfect example. Before you take any step, ask yourself: “what would Jesus do?”.
Now, where is the starting point? How can you manifest the evidence of divine wisdom in your relationship?
“The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding” (Proverbs 9:10).
It is very difficult for any individual to find joy in marital relationship without the fear of the Lord, keeping the person in compliance with the nature of Christ Jesus.
Marriage is not man’s idea or creation. It originated from God, with standard operating manual for success.
“For no other foundation can any one lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ” (1st Corinthians 3:11).
If the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, it means that not living under the fear of God in marital and premarital relationship is the beginning of foolishness. So, where is the evidence of God’s love in your relationship?
The world may applaud you for divorcing your spouse over trivial matters in order to marry another or more wives or husbands. You lack wisdom and the fear of God, because God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16).
If you perfect the act of adultery in your marital relationship or fornication in your premarital relationship, many will applaud you for smartness but it is mere foolishness and display of lack of wisdom and fear of God.
If you are good at lying to ladies or guys about your intentions to marry them only to use and dump them, you are very foolish in the sight of God even though people will applaud you, saying you are wise.
“The wisdom of the world is foolishness unto God” ((1st Corinthians 3:19). Besides, you are a servant of the father of all liars (John 8:44).
“But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death” (Revelation 21:8).
If you hide your true identity from your fiance or fiancée to avoid revealing the fact that you had a child before meeting him or her, and you think doing this will secure your marriage and living happily ever after, you are being foolish. Integrity and transparency is wisdom. Don’t listen to those who are misleading you and encouraging you to deceive yourself and deceive someone else.
Premarital sex (fornication) and pregnancy before marriage to gain assurance of fertility or wedding and applauded in today’s world but there is no divine wisdom in such sinful acts.
“Flee from fornication (1st Corinthians 6:18).
“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? (1st Corinthians 6:19-20)
“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then, you will be able to discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God (Romans 12:2).
It is okay by the people of this world if you bear malice with your spouse and avoid communication with him or her, and still go to church in that condition to clap hands, shout, disturb the whole church environment and deceive yourself. Not forgiving your spouse’s offence is foolishness before God. Jesus said “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your father will not forgive your sins” (Matthew 6:14 NIV). “Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar, and there, remember, that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First, go and be reconciled with your brother; then, come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23-24 NIV).
Based on the standards of this foolish world, it is okay sometimes to beat up your spouse in reaction to an offence or to publicly insult your spouse. This is great foolishness.
Your friends may commend you for making someone chase away his or her lawfully wedded spouse in order to marry you. But I tell you the truth that your foolishness knows no bounds. The cane used for chasing away the rightful owner of that property is still on standbye. It is just a matter of time because you cannot outsmart God.
Living contrary to Gods standards and expectations in marriage is foolishness and evidence of lack of wisdom. So, I ask you again; where is wisdom in your premarital or marital relationship?
FOR QUESTIONS, PRAYERS, COUNSEL, CONTACT
Pastor Albinus Chiedu