Wanted! A Confident Wife
If you are a lady, ripe for marriage but your own husband is yet to meet or approach you, there is hope for you if you are in Christ Jesus. He says: “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask WHATEVER you wish, and it will
be done for you” (John 15:7).
However, it is important that you look inwards and ensure that your self confidence is intact. Confidence is one of the major qualities that RESPONSIBLE young men seek in a wife.
It is not what happens to you that matters but what happens in you. You might have on your face, a scar from a fatal or domestic accident that occurred once upon a time. You might be dark complexioned but would have preferred to be a fair lady. Perhaps your legs are not so straight and you assume you are not good looking enough for guys. Maybe you think your height or inadequate educational qualification is a deterrent to young men from approaching you for a relationship. Have you been involved in pre-marital relationships that got broken and you are blaming yourself for the predicament? Do you suspect that your set of teeth or eyes that are not so bright are responsible? Do you despise the size of your body or boobs and assume they are not attractive enough to young men? Is it about poor parental background? Background must never hinder your foreground.
None of the above factors may be your problem because apart from physical appearance, beauty is more about self confidence. If you are a confident lady and you recognize your self worth, you are beautiful. You are more beautiful than you think; more beautiful than so many other ladies.
IN SOME CASES, if you see a lady that is not beautiful by your assessment and she is getting attention, not as a reward for sin, check her confidence level. Recognize your self worth. Work with what you have. Apart from your dress and physical looks, your walking steps, added to clarity and firmness in your voice when you speak, combine to present your confidence. You could dress so gorgeously and fantastically and yet, walk like a panicky or scared person and talk like someone who is afraid, thereby displaying a lack of confidence. Many a guy would never consider such a lady as a wife material.
My dear, no woman in this whole wide world has everything. What you see are women who appreciate their self worth and confidently work with what they have in a way that does not offend God, but glorifies him.
For instance, a man asks you to sell your dignity to him by having sex with him, without any official marriage rites. What goes on in your mind? You feel you have to comply in order to get his commitment to marry you. When you do that, you have simply pushed your self respect into the gutter. Apart from the fact that premarital sex lacks the capacity to secure fulfilment of a promise to marry you, even if he eventually marries you, an impression is already established in his mind that you can as well, open your legs for any other man without any marriage rites. Trust, which sustains a relationship may not survive in your marriage eventually.
Sister, you are too valuable to be toiled with. You are the most beautiful woman in the world for YOUR OWN husband that you are yet to meet, see or marry. Do not out of lack of confidence, destroy his golden elements in you before he finds you.
To ensure that you marry your own husband and not another person’s own, you must conquer prevalent fears like the fear of rejection and the fear of never getting married. You fight to keep a premarital relationship alive amidst abuse, pain, torture you might be suffering from it. You feel breaking up, means not being good enough for the guy. So, you struggle for his acceptance in spite of his character flaws and weaknesses.
There is also fear of getting old and fear of personality inadequacy. In some cases, sister feels that because the guy is not pressurising her for sex, she must be below standard. She holds unto the relationship for so long, waiting for the young man to endorse her value with marriage, as if he is God. But the truth is that men can smell fear. They can sense your motives if you are desperately hanging on to the relationship because of fear. Please, deal with fear. Become more confident in your premarital relationship. If someone is not qualified to be your spouse, the person is not. Don’t hang on to the relationship because of fear.
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a
sound mind” (2nd Timothy 1:7).
A confident lady loves God and obeys God’s word to the letter because there is place for divine GRACE and DELIVERANCE from demonic influence. She craves for a husband that loves God, prays for him and does everything to draw his attention to the things of God. This is the lady that responsible guys seek as wife.
However, except in the course of official relationships, or as a reaction to a life-threatening behaviour such as attempted rape, don’t ever use a commanding tone on a guy in a way that portrays you as being disrespectful, especially if you are in a premarital or marital relationship with him. Self confidence does not mean disrespect or disobedience to biblical instructions. A lady must know where to draw a line between both.
Other attractions to responsible guys include humility, sincerity, trust, focus and homeliness. You could register for our Marriage Preparatory Programme holding from November 9 to 11, 2018 in Lagos. It will help you.
Above all, “trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding..”
+234 8038117704, firstname.lastname@example.org