If you are a young man, ripe for marriage but you are yet to find your good thing called a wife, there is hope for you if you are in Christ Jesus. He says: “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask WHATEVER you wish, and it will
be done for you” (John 15:7).
However, it is important that you look inwards and ensure that you are RESPONSIBLE enough to marry a wife. Also, CONFIDENCE is one of the major qualities that RESPONSIBLE single ladies seek in a husband.
What happens to you cannot prove your confidence and level of responsibility as a man, more than what happens in you as you travel through the challenging roads of life. Your self confidence in seeking the kind of wife you desire might have been eroded by some wrong perceptions about marital relationship. For instance, you might have felt that your not being a university graduate, is an impediment to marrying a graduate wife. It could also be that you are not bold enough to propose marriage to your desired character of a wife because your spoken English is bad. Maybe your inferiority complex is born out of your poor financial status or you are the type of guy who believes a man must have money in billions before proposing marriage to a lady.
Unfortunately, your perceptions are just too wrong. The responsible, single lady that is searching for her own husband is looking for character; good character. She is not even looking at most of those factors that have limited your self confidence and kept you unmarried for so long.
Maybe you are even busy comparing yourself with peers. “I wish I had so and so, that Mr. A or B has, I would have attracted a good wife. Can’t you see that his wife is so happy being with him? It is because of those things he has.”
Brother! You are so wrong. No matter how much you condemn a Rolls Royce car, it can never become a Beetle. Whatever people think about you does not define who you are. It only reflects their own inadequacies of not having a 360 degrees mind. Their opinions about you can be wrong. They are indeed, wrong if you have a positive character based on Biblical standards. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).
Maybe you have found your missing rib and you have been prayerfully convinced. But you are not confident enough to approach her, open your mouth and say what is on your mind. You do not have to be intimidated by a lady’s credentials, be they natural, intellectual or spiritual. Just be sure that the desire you have for her was put there by God and not Satan. If the Lord is leading you to your wife-to-be, then, be sure that no weapon formed against you shall prosper. Drop that fear. Realize that no matter now beautiful and intelligent a woman may be, a man must marry her and she craves for the love of that man. Why do you think you cannot be that man? You cannot be intimidated if the Lord is the one directing you. If the Lord be for you, who can be against you? Prayerfully tell her what you want. Don’t be intimidated or fearful.
“For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a
sound mind” (2nd Timothy 1:7).
To attract a good wife, you MUST be responsible. If you are a guy that beats up women as if they are children, you are not responsible. If you are a guy that seduces a lady to have sex with her when you have not performed the required marriage rites, you are irresponsible. If you are the type that lies to women, you are not responsible. If you are a guy that exhibits what you are not when you appear before ladies, just to impress them, check your life.
A responsible single sister desires a man that she can give her hope of a better future, working together. If you are a guy that talks and thinks more of now than the future, you cannot attract her. Talk more about a future with her, your dreams for her career, your future children, your dream building project, your relationships with her relatives, how you intend to enhance your joint service of God in future, your plans for her spiritual life, and so on. Talk less about how much you bought the clothes you are currently wearing, the price of the car you currently drive, etc.
If your destiny decisions such as where you will live, who you will marry and what job you will are still left to your mum, dad, aunty or some other relatives to make, you are not responsible enough to attract a confident, responsible wife.
A confident, responsible young man has the fear of God. He dresses responsibly and appears neat most times. Your wife-to-be desires a guy who convinces her that he says what he means and knows what he says; a bold person who can protect her and who she can rely on. Do not deliberately leave her to ALWAYS pay your bills, especially when you both are working and you earn more than her.
Your walking steps, added to clarity and firmness in your voice when you speak, combine to present your confidence. When you say something, say it clearly. Don’t talk as if you have water in your mouth. You could dress fantastically and yet, walk like a panicky and scared person and talk like someone who is afraid, thereby displaying a lack of confidence. Many responsible ladies would never consider such a guy as a husband material.
A responsible guy loves, fears, respects and obeys God and his word. All responsible single sisters desire such husband. Are you? Above all, read
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